No, I'm not asking for resources. I've consulted every resource I can find, but even after more than a decade of research, I still have no conlang to show for it. I started with the Language Construction Kit 1 and 2, learned everything I could about linguistics, consulted every guide I could find, and I still don't know a damned thing. All I have to show for all this work is mountains of repetitive phonologies that occasionally have some grammar notes that never went anywhere due to them turning out to be impractical.
Clearly I'm doing something wrong; what else do I have to do other than research? No amount of research seems to help me. Obviously, I need to do something different, but what can I do? I've tried to make experimental conlangs, but that seems to just mean I accept that all my conlangs are going to hit a brick wall and then be abandoned rather than expecting it to actually go somewhere for once.
edit: What have I tried? I keep trying to use features I don't fully understand. For the longest time, I tried to make a language with fluid s alignment. I later found I didn't understand what that meant. I tried to make a VSO conlang, but also kept running into syntax problems I could not solve until I found out what VSO really was. Long story, time and time again, I can never make use of a feature I don't understand. What does it mean to understand? I can say what ergative alignment is, but I don't know the endless ramifications of having such a system. I only understand systems I've used myself extensively. What that means is I only know the features of English and German. Nothing else. I can define cases that German does not have, but I only know really know how to use the ones German has. I tried to solve this recently by mixing English and German, but I can't find anyway to make such languages function. Essentially, after all my studying, all I really know how to do is make a perfect relex of either English or German. It has to work 100% like one or the other. That is not conlanging; that's making a bad cipher.
I need to know how to actually conlang. How do I fully understand how to use any grammatical feature? The only way for me is to know and use a language that has it, nothing else works. I did contemplate trying to learn odd languages like Hungarian to fix this, but I've never been able to learn a language I had no use for. I've also been told that learning a whole language just to learn to conlang is highly excessive. What other way is there? How do I learn to use features I haven't had years of personal experience with? That is my problem; I don't fully understand anything. I can make a perfect replica of either English's or German's tense systems, but I can't make one that even slightly deviates from one or the other. I can use nominative, accusative, genitive, and dative cases, but forget anything else. I can use SVO order, and German's odd order, but I can't even make an SOV language let alone VSO and anything with an OS order is literally unfathomable to me.
Everything I've studied has not been sufficient; if I want to understand even one thing, such as a lative case just for an example, I would need a thick book that does nothing but explain it. I need to know every way it can be utilized, what it forces upon a language, because only then do I truly understand it. How can I learn to do this?